


constellations

by throughout



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Coda, Fluff and Angst, Immortal Alec Lightwood, Immortality, M/M, They'll figure it out ok, soon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-26
Updated: 2018-04-26
Packaged: 2019-04-28 03:14:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14440251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/throughout/pseuds/throughout
Summary: Coda to Shadowhunters 3x07.Magnus and Alec talk. About a lot of important things.





	constellations

**Author's Note:**

> GAH it's been so long since I wrote something and it felt really good to hash this out and I have a shit ton of work to do for school but it's! ok! 
> 
> find me on tumblr [@goldenalec](http://goldenalec.tumblr.com/) <3

“I will fix it. I will use the last drop of my power if it’s the death of me.”

His voice is laden with guilt, and sorrow, and resolve, and it sends a torrent of pain through Alec. He pushes aside everything that had happened, from that disastrous breakfast, to the image of the box still branded into his memory, and steps forward. He tugs Magnus to him, wrapping his arms around his shoulders tightly.

It takes Magnus a second to sink into the hug. But then he does, and Alec feels him melt against his body, feels the residual tension from their meeting with the others earlier slowly leave his shoulders and fall to the floor. Suddenly, everything fades away. The noise of the Institute melts into the background. All Alec can feel is him, his grounding presence against the chaos of everything.

When they break apart, he lingers close. He can’t step away. Not now.

Magnus glances up at him then. “Are you coming back tonight?” His voice is soft, barely above a whisper, apprehension lingering. Like he still expects Alec to push him away. 

Alec swallows, trying to ignore the painful muscle that pulls in his chest. There’s nothing he wants more. He wants to forget everything, for just a moment, wants to go to the loft that he had thought of as home, wants to feel Magnus’ arms wrap around him. He wants to shove aside the storm brewing inside him, the fear for his parabatai. The pain of the argument, and Magnus’ eyes, brewing with anger, cutting into him not a day ago.

The steady beat of his own heart, something that had begun to feel like a countdown.

“Do you want me to?” He asks carefully, because he won’t, not if Magnus needs his space.

“Yes.” The word rushes out of Magnus, quiet, yet fervent. His eyes are open, soft brown, lined with muted black, gazing into Alec’s.

Alec brings a hand up to touch his face, slowly at first, asking for permission, and cups his face gently when Magnus leans into his touch. His eyes flutter shut for just a second, before he opens them again.

“Okay.”

No sooner than the word falls from his lips, Alec feels the familiar surge of wind from a portal hit the back of his neck. He folds his fingers into Magnus’, and walks backwards until the wave of magic envelopes him. Portal travel has never been the most comfortable experience, but it’s different when it’s Magnus. To Alec, it feels as familiar as Magnus’ rings pressing into the palm of his hand, as familiar as his smile on a warm morning. As familiar as his lips, mapping out constellations on his skin.

And Magnus keeps his eyes fixed on Alexander as they step into the bedroom of the loft. The light is softer here. The rushed voices and sounds of the Institute linger in his ears, slowly softening into silence.

Magnus waves his free hand to change both of them out of their clothes and into more comfortable ones. He walks them over to the bed. Feels Alexander’s fingers tighten their hold on his own as they slip under the covers.

It feels different. A line of tension winds its way down the contours of Alexander’s shoulders, a residual crease between his eyebrows. There’s a space between them on the bed where they lay facing each other. A space currently occupied by their intertwined hands.

The curve of Alexander’s lip cuts through the soft light of the room. Magnus allows himself to memorize every inch of him. Allows himself to find peace, and home, in the luminous hazel of his eyes.

“I’m sorry.” Magnus whispers, and almost immediately, the burning begins in his throat, and his eyes sting with the promise of tears. 

Alec brings Magnus’ hand up to his lips, eyes wet. He presses a small kiss to the back of his palm. “I’m sorry too,” he murmurs against his skin. His gaze finds Magnus’ again, “We both said things we shouldn’t have.”

Magnus licks his lips before reaching a hand to place it against Alec’s cheek. He runs his thumb over the expanse of his cheekbone, feeling the prickle of day-old stubble against his fingers. Alec’s eyes are wide, and soft, and he’s looking at him with the kind of look Magnus only sees when it’s directed towards him. Like the doors to heaven could open up for him and he’d still want to be right here, in Magnus’ arms.

He’s so beautiful.

“I was reminded of something today.” Alec says quietly, thumb drawing small circles over the back of Magnus’ palm, “I don’t know if you already know this, but I hadn’t remembered it till now.”

He swallows, takes in a breath before speaking again, “Nephilim – we only love once.”

Magnus’ fingers stop in their gentle movements, “What do you mean?”

Alec shifts closer to him, “I mean, we only fall in love, like _truly_ fall in love, once. In our whole lives. We could be with a number of people, but once we find the one? That’s – that’s it. Forever.”

Magnus had known of the intensity of a mortal’s life, how they felt everything more in every sense of the word. But he hadn’t expected this. Hadn’t expected to find the beat of Alec’s heart tied inexplicably to his own. And he can’t remember when his heart had picked up its pace, when it had begun to feel like nothing outside this room and this cocoon of blankets and this man lying across from him mattered.

“So what you said over breakfast, it’s not true. Even if I had been with someone before you, it wouldn’t have made a difference,” Alec continues, completely oblivious to Magnus’ heart thrumming an erratic rhythm against his chest, “because you’re it for me. You were _always_ going to be it. You are, quite literally, the love of my life.”

It’s in moments like this, when Alexander speaks to him as though there is a direct connection between his mouth and his heart, that leave Magnus lost for words. Alec has always been the kind of person who, when he feels something, feels it to the core of his being. The intensity with which he feels, and loves, is something that Magnus loves endlessly about him.

And it’s the wrong time to be at a loss for words, because all Magnus wants to do now is tell Alec that there is never going to be anyone else for him either, that this, what they have, _this_ is it. _This_ is what he wants forever, that Alexander Lightwood is the love of his life. That Magnus would move heaven and earth and hell and everything in between to find a way to keep this until time itself became obsolete.

He leans forward and closes the distance between their lips. It’s a kiss meant to love, and affirm. A promise, that this is as real for him as it is for Alexander.

When he pulls back, Alec’s eyes remain shut for a few more seconds, like he had found himself again. Magnus drinks in the way the hazel of his eyes reminds him of the forest, and of sunshine, and of honeyed kisses all at once.

“Do you have any idea how much I love you?” It’s not a question Magnus expects an answer to, and he sees the effect of the words in Alec, in the way the crease between his eyebrows softens immediately, the way his lips part. The way pure adoration pours from his eyes.

Magnus pulls him closer, until Alexander’s breath ghosts over his collarbones. He wraps his arm around Alec’s torso, pulling the one still locked with Alec’s up to his chest.

“If I could have my way with the world, I’d have you by my side forever. I’d never let you go.”

He presses his lips to Alec’s knuckles. “I meant what I said, Alexander, all those weeks ago,” he says quietly, “That you’d unlocked something in me. This – this is it for me too.”

_And I will do whatever it takes to keep it that way._

“I love you.” Alec whispers, and Magnus can sense the underlying promise in his voice, and he knows that even though the fight to find their forever will be long, and arduous, he won’t be alone.

He kisses Alexander again, for that promise. For a love that feels like that the stars had aligned themselves right in front of him.

“I love you too.”


End file.
